by swaneagle haijan
When my daughter told me she wished to go to school for the first time in her 13 years, i warned her that she would have to deal with racism. She told me she could handle it. I told her i would support her.
As an unorthodox mother of mixed race children, i have witnessed the suffering foisted upon 2 of my children at very young ages by other children who were their friends. Both my son and my youngest daughter have been called “nigger” by friends and strangers alike. Sadly, entering school seems to give some children the confidence to behave as bullies.
The cruelty my son experienced forced our family to leave Stevens County in ’83 as i had no skills to assist my son in his bewildered pain, nor had i done any dismantling bigotry work on myself at that time. The isolation we experienced is unique to areas overwhelmingly white with “pioneer”
descendents steeped in bigotry along with newer, more liberal
populations who tend to minimize the seriousness of racism. I simply did not have a clue and had believed that the people i knew and loved were not racist. Most importantly, i learned about the depth of my racism that i devote continuous effort eradicating.
My son, Adrian, now is a successful, inspired reggae musician of conscience in Seattle. His background has kept his focus clear in the wonder of his art forms. I attribute to him the growth i have made over the years around my own privilege and racism. It is because of him that i began my path of nonviolence. The power children have to catalize change is potent and must be carried over into all areas of life. Their experiences are key to solution if only we can hear them and heed their young, unjaded hearts. Tho he encourages me to leave this area, his efforts in our lives have helped in the work both Taina and i do around issues of intolerance.
In 1992, i returned to this region to birth my youngest. It was a time of brief hope for me as a human rights group formed to address the blatant actions of skinheads recruiting youth in Colville’s Yep Kanum Park as well as an influx of Christian Identity adherents and the growing visibility of Christian Patriot militias. During the early to mid 90’s, several sensational crimes were carried out by 3 of these violent
characters, including the kidnapping of local store owners by a skinhead who dropped them off in a Spokane parking lot; the killing of a black Arkansas gun dealer, his wife and child by Chevie Kehoe, a Christian Identity believer; the shooting of several children in a Los Angeles Jewish community center followed by the shooting death of a Filipino mailman by Buford Furrow, an associate of Richard Butler. All 3 of these
criminals acting out violent hate lived in Stevens County. I believed that finally more progressive locals were now committed to addressing the serious level of racism infecting this region as well as facing it’s history: the killings of Chinese placer miners and railroad workers; the theft of
Indigenous lands and ongoing genocide; the initial placement of the white cross above the city of Colville by the Ku Klux Klan in the mid 1920’s set aflame when attacks on “immoral” citizens were imminent; the influence of the John Birch Society, called by some, the gateway to white supremacy.
By 1992, i had taken many anti racism trainings; had been living and working closely for 8 years with traditional Dineh (Navajo) resister, Pauline Whitesinger, who was one of many elders calling for nonIndians to be human rights observers to their spiritual refusal to forcible relocation; spent considerable time with women of varying racial backgrounds who shared their experiences surviving and fighting racism,
colonialism, sexism, white supremacy, classism, elitism, violence; had been researching, writing, witnessing, speaking and documenting abuses against “invisible” peoples on reservations, in cities and rural areas. I eagerly participated in meetings of the human rights group until, after nearly 5 years, i lost heart. My radical ideas about dismantling oppressive behaviors were not welcome, rather a more conservative approach was preferred. I viewed it as a band-aid on a gaping wound.
I also experienced harassment from a male member, who disliked my history of working with the American Indian Movement, my issues with the U.S. governement and oppressive forms of Christianity. I found little to no support. I did what i could to share information, but came to see that the northwest umbrella organization was entrenched in the mainstream to the exclusion and silencing of traditional peoples, Hippies, the very poor and other extremely marginalized people. Tho i spent some time talking with the well known coordinator of the umbrella organization, he told me i was ahead of my time and that most people just were
not ready to do dismantling bigotry work of the deep nature i was suggesting. My views and skills, as one who resides in the margins as a below poverty level, single Hippie mother of mixed race children with extensive experience working with this country’s most disenfranchised, were not seen as valuable. I quit.
I have now been living with my youngest in the same small cabin above the Columbia River for almost 14 years, tho we have been gone almost half that time while i have worked at various jobs in the winter in Olympia or Berkeley, attended Evergreen State College and done human rights work thru out the northwest and southwest. I have considered moving,
but have yet to find anywhere we can survive living as simply and self-sufficiently as we do with a very meager budget. I have been able to raise my youngest, homeschooling her til she entered the 8th grade at Orient School in the fall of 2005. Being there for her, instilling values of justice, equality and first hand experiences with the struggles of Pauline, the people of Black Mesa, border issues impacting Mexican and migrant people, homelessness and femicide have been our priorities. Taina has remarkable courage and conscience.
We picked Orient due to the quality of teachers, the school board members, the parents, the children and the awareness among people of diverse heritages. Several of the children Taina has known all her life and both they and their parents have truly humanitairan outlooks that would come to mean tremendous support as Taina encountered attacks based on
her appearance, her darker skin, her lively hair.
The first time Taina told me about being ridiculed due to how she looks, i had just picked her up at the bus stop 5 miles from home. She told me one boy told her how his older step-brother and step-sister made fun of Taina’s looks, her hair and her clothing. She told me she was not going to cry because she believed in herself. I was profoundly moved. She called her friends and talked to them, getting their opinions. Over the next few days, she talked directly to the boy’s older brother and told him how she felt. He admitted to nothing telling her his sister did it and that such comments were wrong. She let it go and became friends with the youngest boy.
I talked to Gretchen Cruden, Taina’s teacher about this first incident. She offered her support to Taina and commended her directness in dealing with the siuation.
Then Taina told me she heard yet another younger boy ask an older brother what a nigger was. The older one said, “a black person”. Taina eventually told the sister of the 2 boys that nigger is a derrogatory term. She shared stories and information with her friend about racism and sensitivity towards those who are different.
One day another classmate referred to Taina as a nigger behind her back. His friend told Taina and she immediately went to talk to the offender. Later she told me she could tell most people were simply ignorant, not meaning to be hurtful. That boy also became a friend. I was impressed at her honesty around touchy issues that often led to friendship!
I talked to Gretchen, about showing the Whoopie Goldberg film of the Montgomery bus boycott, “The Long Walk Home”. Taina loved this movie and after first seeing it wanted to show it to all her friends. So as the name calling kept on, Taina felt it would be a good tool to educate kids in her class. Unfortunately, Gretchen watched it first then told
us it could not be shown due to the cussing. We never did acquire another film, so nothing like that occurred. But Gretchen noted Taina’s ability to talk to the kids who hurt her with kindness and compassion. She told Taina that she was brave. Gretchen herself posesses astounding communication abilities that i believe improved and augmented Taina’s.
In the spring, Taina had a friend spend the night. When her friend went home, Taina began acting very rude and angry. I could not figure it out. She threw several of her own things, including a lovely wooden chair that broke. Finally, she curled into a ball on the floor crying. She told me her friend heard a high school boy tell her older brother and her
that “Taina was the dark skinned, frizzy headed girl who was an ugly nigger that sat in the back of the bus”. I called a teacher at the boy’s high school who i knew had been part of the now defunct human rights group and used Morris Dees’, of the Southern Poverty Law Center, “Teaching Tolerance” curriculum in her class. The boy in question was one of
her students. She did not seem to think it was that big of a deal. She said Taina should just talk to the boy herself when it worked out for her to do so. I actually felt like she minimized the situation. It was not a satisfactory experience.
I must say that i have felt for a long time that the term “tolerance” implies barely accepting someone. People of other races and gender preferences also have told me they find the “Teaching Tolerance” curriculum poorly named.
I also have issues with the Southern Poverty Law Center’s pro FBI, pro gun and pro capitalist stance. After the NONVIOLENT WTO protests that i was part of in Seattle, the SPLC’s Intellignece Report featured an article by Martin Lee about the massive demonstrations called, “Neither Left Nor Right”.
I find it hard to believe that Lee was in Seattle during the shutting down of the highly secretive WTO ministerial meetings. Over 50,000 of us formed a human chain, that not only effectvely shut down the WTO, but shown a global spotlight on one of the most secretive corporate and government organizations in the world. Sadly, the infiltrated window breakers received the focus of the corrupt press. I was astounded at the lies printed in the local Seattle papers. My friend, Life has Meaning,(a Gandhian scholar and practitioner) was beaten by police one day and shot in the eye the next. I saw all this, as well as gathering photos,
videos and eye witnesses for her lawsuit against the city and the Seattle Police Department in which she was awarded a $105,000 out of court settlement, tho it did not fully compsenate her permanent partial blindness and other trauma. So Martin Lee’s article, which focused on racist right
elements who also were in the streets, made it look like most of us were not principled resisters to corporate plunder and it’s attendenthuman rights violations world wide. This inaccuracy is continually played out by the FBI, mainstream press as well as mainstream human rights organizations that i know continue exlcluding the voices of the most downtrodden. This has got to stop. It is condoning the mistreatment
of the voiceless and assisting in silencing the truth about how serious scapegoating and racist violence is in the country. I speak as a witness to horror. We MUST pay
attention and prevention is still possible in ourcommunities. Soon, it will simply be too late.
Not long after the incident with the high school boy, Taina told me that over one weekend somebody had spray painted “queer bag” on the school building and “nigger” on the outdoor basketball court covering it with skid marks from car tires. Her friend called telling Taina she had seen the hate graffiti. Taina wanted to see for herself thinking she might recognize the handwriting, but by the time she got to school, it had been removed. So i called Tara Holmes, the principle of Orient and had a good talk with her. She told me that due to the height of the spraying on the building and the skid marks, that teenagers or adults were the likely culprits. She reported it to the Ferry County Sheriff.
Over the school year, i taught short series of art classes at both Orient and Valley schools to first thru 8th graders. It was a wonderfully inspiring experience as i showed them the photo displays of our time at Big Mountain working with Pauline and the other traditional weavers, almost a dozen of their wool rugs and the art i have done directly influenced by living with these courageous women. Many of the children
were very cognizant of the injustice imposed upon Native Americans by Europeans and current descendents. Several children told me they were Native American. The heart children displayed in their creative enthusiasm was significant. The woman who obtained the art grant for these schools was Gloria De Los Santos Geary, an artist, photographer and amazing dynamo.
As the events kept unfolding impacting Taina’s young life, i began sharing the stories with Gloria. She then told me of some incidents of racism she has endured in this area as a Mexican American. We then talked of organizing a week long series of workshops, talks, art classes, dances, performance reflecting the untapped diversity of Native Americans, Asians, African Americans, etc,in this region and beyond that many living here have never been exposed to. Gloria and i
went to the Orient School board meeting sharing the idea and asking for approval to be funded by next year’s art budget that Gloria already has coming as the last of the 2 year art grant. Our plan was approved by the Orient School Board.
Shortly before Taina’s 8th grade graduation, i received a phone message from Tara Holmes inviting me to the “Heroes In Training” workshop the week after school was out for the summer. I decided to go and Gloria went as well. Beforehand, Taina brought me some articles describing the HIT curriculum. I was happy to see that this effort was being made to educate children about the difference between celebraties and true
heroes. Tho i had some doubts about certain white men picked as heroes, many of those listed were wonderful models, including Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Harriet Tubman, Wilma Mankiller, Hellen Keller and Ann Sullivan among others.
The workshop was well attended and conducted by Rachel Bernheim and Kathleen Morin from the Roul Wallenberg Foundation in New York City. Wallenberg was a Swedish diplomat who saved over 100,000 Jews from extermination. He was apprehended by the Russians in 1945 and never seen
again. The foundation has an impressive 2,000 page curriculum that is used in schools all over the U.S. Communities are encouraged to choose their own heroes as well as using those provided by the Wallenberg Foundation. People came from Kootnai County Task Force on Human Relations in northern Idaho, who had participated in the shutting down of Richard Butler’s white supremacist compound in Hayden Lake. I talked to one man, from the KCTFHR, unfamiliar with the Christian Identity community at Marble Flats, south of Northport. He told me he wanted to introduce me to the FBI. Little does he know that the FBI spies on the likes of me, a story best told elsewhere.
Here is where the nature of who i am and what i do comes in. I am deeply devoted to nonviolence and a level of addressing the “isms” among us that perpetrate exclusion, poverty, alienation, violence, oppressive behaviors of all kinds. Each of us has known oppression and each has oppressed another to varying degrees. In corporate backed war culture,
competition, back stabbing, slander, mistrust,dysfunctional relationships, power over in it’s myriad manifestations afflict us all. I know several areas of oppression myself that have kept me in visceral contact with others who, all too
often, suffer way more than i do. Marginalization is where i reside, not by clear choice as much as heeding my heart.
must be returned to Indigenous people, my anti corporate, anti
capitalistic stance, my issues with all guns and all weapons, militaries, paramilitaries, police, FBI abuses of Indigenous peoples, African Americans, Peace Activists, Muslims among others increasingly harassed in the name of “homeland security”. In this county where i live many criticize me who have never truly talked to me. I have heard second hand
inaccuracies, not to mention lies broadcast over the radio while working in my garden. It is painful. Such behaviors have also hurt my children. But we are strong people doing our best, as most people are.
I also believe that the constitution was established by and for white male landowners leaving everyone else out. Constructing a truly inclusive constitution, with all peoples represented fairly is long over due. I am quite opposed to
Founding Father syndrome that even progressive people spew in some convoluted effort to bring back a form of peace and justice that has yet to exist in these lands soaked with the blood of Indigenous peoples, African Americans, Chinese, Labor Organizers, Anarchists, Mexicans, Migrants, Activists and countless others who do not fit into the concept of what it
is to be American. To address the systemic roots of white supremacy is to commit to authentic equality beyond what we have ever known. To uproot the culture of hate is to reclaim family, community, village, and the concentric realities of being human that defy war and unfettered greed. There is no moneytary profit in such solutions. Re-examing survival and
relationships is critical to whether or not humans survive at all the current horrific nightmare.
Instilling effective human rights priciples in this area requires acknowledging and addressing the facets of oppression that continue excluding and harming others. It also requires an honest assessment of the underbelly of racist history. If we fail to do this, ugliness will morph quickly into violence. It is my concern that minimizing or ignoring the
seriousness of what Taina encountered will simmer and boil over into something beyond mere name calling and hateful graffiti. Tho Heroes In Training explores diverse examples of stellar people, it is not addressing the depth of prevention needed. It is a good step in that direction. But somehow, mainstream human rights organization that have great
influence continue to deny and minimize the abuses of the FBI and other armed forces in this society.
My writing is not published. It has been years since even a letter to the local paper was printed. When i post flyers, they are taken down. To share my revolutionary ideas of solution requires adherence to my heart and knowing that someday i may be able to fully write about and publish what has come to me thru experience, commitment and the striving
for integrity. Yet, i continue with my work via the internet, which has given me of taste of freedom of speech i would have never known otherwise. Why fear so prevails in Stevens County has been a source of anguish to me for many years. I have to leave here to feel valued in the work i do best. It just is ridiculous. Too many liberal/progressive people are overly concerned about being associated with those of us who
do not look mainstreamish.
When i was vigiling in front of the army recruiter in downtown Colville, i had a man come up to me saying, “Don’t you think you would be more effective if you weren’t vigiling with a bunch of dead head looking guys?” I told him pre-occupation with appearance was one of the
problems of this region. If people were more concerned about unity and inclusion, we would truly be effective. I have had people tell me i would be more influential if i changed my name and clothing. I also have been attacked as being a “cultural thief” by a part Sinixt man due to my name as well as my Hippie culture. When i first began my activism over 25
years ago, my way of dressing was an issue for elder, white, activist men on the east coast. To this day, i encounter variations on the theme. It is a facet of why we have no deeply aligned cross cultural movement in this country today, when the Earth and her peoples need it the
most.
Taina has accomplished what i could not. Talking about racism to people in this area has perhaps made somewhat of a shift in awareness. It was Taina’s painful challenges and how she handled them that had true impact. I am sorry that the burden of confronting racism fell upon her young shoulders. She rose to the occasion by speaking up rather than
internalizing these experiences. She also was encouraged by all those who know and love her, which says something wonderful about this community. It is truly why we both still live here. Perhaps Taina will be the conduit to opening the door for deeper change. If anyone can articulate what must be done to impliment loving kndness and equality, it is my
daughter Taina.
In peaceful struggle,
swaneagle harijan
Hippie Frontline Mom
Woman In Black
Lifetime NonIndian Supporter
of Traditional Indigenous Peoples